Wednesday, October 26, 2005

What's a girl to do?

Things are difficult; I need to figure out what my career path is going to be. In retrospect, I have had 5 different career paths in 3 years. I have worked for the public sector, the non-profit sector, a large corporate office, the service industry and am presently working in the legal sector. Do I want to stay in the legal sector? In what capacity? Is it too much to ask that my job be interesting, challenging and fulfilling, oh and that I earn enough to live comfortably? Are benefits too much to ask for? Which way do I turn and what path should I try next? My father once told me that stability comes from within; do I really want stability or have I unconsciously chosen this path for myself? I have learned that I have a hard time committing - what if it is the wrong place for me? I always need an out and having positions where I am not passionate and feeling like I am changing the world gives me that out - I need to feel that I can leave at any time. I think I want a position that is challenging, but do I really? I am scared. Of what? The golden handcuffs - a job where it gives me just enough pay and benefits that I stay. I am scared to stay because I am scared to stop moving, of being sedimentary. I am scared of security because it has a boring conotation in my mind. I am scared of becoming boring and flat. That is why I must find a calling that makes me feel alive and active and intelligent and challenged. I need a vocation, and more immediately, a good cup of coffee.

1 comment:

zoNa said...

there is an article in the NY Times on October 30th called "What is a Modern Girl to Do?" I think you would be very interested...