Grants...you're so money and you don't even know it...

I am in the process of applying for 2 grants based on a research project that I have NO idea what it will be. Women's empowerment is surprisingly a large area of study. What does this mean? It means that I have to sound like I have a research project fully mapped out, subject, methodology and all, while in reality, being general enough that no matter what my research project is for the UN, I will not be completely off-base. So, I am writing a lot about women's economic well-being, honing in on labor-market specific stuff, while throwing in words like "human trafficking" and "ethnicity", "race", "geographic differences", "youth", etc. Part of me wants to end my proposals by saying something to the effect of: I am an Intern for the United Nations Development Fund for Women. My research will include the study of issues through a gendered lens, specifically, how everything effects women of the region. Just give me the money. I can guarantee I will appreciate this more than I can express and who knows, the UN might even publish my findings. There will be no publishing if I can't afford to go. We, at Penn, have a ridiculous endowment, in the hundreds of millions. What is $9000? Chump change. The UN is 'sponsoring' my research in every other way except paying me. Pony up so I can have this opportunity of a lifetime. Hos gotta eat too.

What do you think? I think it could work...

Where there is mastery there is no mystery

You guessed it. I am drinking tea again and this is the oh so wise saying on my Egyptian licorice herbal deliciousness. What does this mean???!! Where there is mastery there is no mystery. First off, I want to add a comma. Mastery of what?

Maybe I should stop trying to decipher the sayings on my tea, but I think it is entertaining. I didn't have my second class today so I am working on grant stuff. I think I am way into my blog because I can feel connected, but not really do much. Ok, I have done NOTHING since my last entry in the grant department. Nada. Zip.

Congratulations to Cata! She has been accepted by the Peace Corps!

Ok, back to mastery and mystery. Hmmm, have I mastered anything? No, I cannot think of anything. At first, I thought I had mastered making coffee but no, there are those days where, for no apparent reason, the coffee is amazing. I put the same amounts (ok close to the same amounts) of creamer, splenda, grounds, water....so I am not a master of anything. I guess my life is full of mystery. Enough procrastinating...have you mastered anything? Is it still mysterious?

Busy Busy Sell Sell!

I am applying for 2 grants through Penn for my research with the UN in Skopje. If I get both of them, that is $9000, which would be awesome! One is through the Women's Studies department for $3000 and the other is through the Graduate and Professional Student Assembly for $6000. Both are due on the 29th. Let's hope I can sell my experience! It is once in a lifetime!!! I also want to get my paper done by then so when Jennie comes to visit, I can be with her out and about as opposed to chained to a library/coffee shop/grad center doing work. I am working on the literature review as we speak.
It's as though my professor knows that I am super stress monkey because one of my classes is cancelled today. Wouldn't it be awesome if my other class were cancelled? We can't have it all. And, as it stands now, it will force me to get dressed and not subsist on hot dogs and coffee alone.

Live in your strength

This is what my wise tea tells me as I prepare to sit down and work on my Program Evaluation Proposal. "Live in your strength". I am trying to figure out what this means. If "strength" were plural instead of singular, I might just list my strengths and think about how better to access them, especially when I feel discouraged, like I did yesterday about funding for Skopje. But no, it is singular. What would it mean to live in strength? Hmmm, this is about as deep as I can go here. I am not a philosopher nor do I even know how to dwell on this, but for some reason, I am thinking about it. Did you get the tickets? TO THE GUN SHOW (see various pics)

Picture of Skopje and visa update

This is the main square in Skopje, Macedonia, my new residence. I called the Macedonian embassy about getting a visa and they referred me to the Consulate in Detroit...why, I am not sure. Anyhow, I talked to this really nice lady, who, after a serious discussion with her boss, informed me they do not issue visas to Americans. So I then asked her what I should do. Apparently, I go to the interior ministry and ask them to extend my stay after I get there. Um, ok. She assured me that since I am working with the UN, it won't be a problem. So did the lone Macedonian on campus. Now, I am trying not to worry about this, however, I wish this issue could be taken care of prior to departure. Oh well, I'll call them when I get my passport back and see if that is still the policy. At least my rent is cheap. About $400/month, including utilities. Sweet.

Fat Cat, Ice Ice Baby and the Macedonian Update

This is my roommate's cat, Manon aka Sumo. I love her. Big is Beautiful. No, I don't know how much she weighs, but I would guess around 23 lbs. She sleeps with me and is generally lovey dovey. She drinks out of the water bowl with the yellow lab and the dog that looks like a black golden retreiver. So cute. We don't tell her that she is obese or not a dog.

This morning, the sidewalks were covered in an inch of ice. An entire inch. Solid. Last night, the rain was freezing as it hit my umbrella so when I finally put the thing down, ice slid off of it. Now, we get snowstorms in Colorado. No big deal. But ice?! One person today told me she is thankful last night was not an ice storm. So if last night with heavy ice rain and solid ice on the sidewalks this morning was not an ice storm, what is? I am not talking about extreme ice storms. Just regular ones. I know we had them in undergrad in Tennessee and this was at least equal to that. The joys of Philly.

Ah, the great Macedonian update. Today, I spent the day filling out my visa application, passport renewal application, printing off grant info, emailing the poor man in Macedonia who helps me with all my questions (we've only just begun), contacting a travel agent who found me, wait for it, $515 one way ticket to Skopja! This, for mid-May, is super cheap, considering the online travel websites were quoting me $1850. So I guess this means I am really going. I seriously cannot believe it. Really. Truly. Tonight: finish urban studies reading on immigration and start going through all the grant stuff!

Why am I writing?

Hello. I just finished reading stuff for my program evaluation class. Now, on to Brown v. Board. At least this book reads more like a novel. I am writing an international law paper. How? I don't know. All I know is I have a copy of the Macedonian Constitution, Criminal Conduct Code, lots of U.N. reports on gender equality and some European Community Law stuff. I have an email out to a law school librarian because when I try to look this stuff up in law reviews, I get over 900,000 hits. Apparently, I do not know how to effectively search.

I am confused. Part of me really wants to have a partner and part of me doesn't care. I know getting attached to anyone at this point would be crazy. And, really, I don't have many options in that department. I don't know what I want anymore! Ahhhh! I guess I will get lost in my books and avoid thinking about it. In all honesty, it has been so long since I had a bonifide boyfriend, I don't think I would know the first thing about being in a relationship. Maybe it is like riding a bicycle. Yeah, a bicycle. Well, you know the old saying: a woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. Last time I checked, Bruce, my old beta fish did not need a bicycle. However, he did require a beautiful backdrop in order to get over his narcolepsy and eating disorder. And you think I am kidding.

Enough about fish, my lack of relationship in the romantic sense and back to desegregation, human trafficking and gender discrimination.

The not-so-lazy Friday afternoon

I am sitting in my room, burning Japanese incense listening to Bob Dylan on my iPod trying to motivate myself to read my work for next week or research Macedonian women's legal rights surrounding workforce issues or search for funding or take a much needed nap, if only for an hour...

Tonight is a mandatory staff meeting (dinner and hopefully drinks included) followed by a raucus game of Spades where Nona and I take on Seth and Hiro. The boys are going down and, unfortunately for them, it will NOT be in a blaze of glory. Nevermind that Hiro has never played before...he's a Japanese attorney, he can figure out how to be calculating!

Ok, duty calls! Be back soon :D

Off to Macedonia!

You are looking at the next intern for the United Nations Development Fund for Women in Skopje, Macedonia. Can you believe it? I can't! I am in total shock and am busy looking for funding - hoorah! Any tips? I believe that I am experiencing shock and awe, but not in the way GWB anticipated. I have to figure out visas, packing, lodging, what my project will be, how to get there, make sure I am totally immunized and healthy, health insurance, life insurance ($100,000 payable to my parents so they can bring my body back and pay student loans off, should the need arise), etc...

So overwhelming! So exciting! I don't know the Cyrillic alphabet or a single word of Macedonian. I don't even know how to spell Cyrillic. But you know what I mean. Oh my gentle Jesus.